Two gigs and a Stripper.

On the one hand, I went to Matter. Its like Fabric (owned by those guys too) but bigger and dumber....if that's possible. Anyway it was a Cocoon night, so Sven Vath was doing an extended set. Not that I wanted to see him, as I'm sure some earlier posts in this blog will attest to. I think he is a shit dj. I really have to stop seeing him, but somehow I always manage to catch him. Its like a bad smell following me around. I really wanted to see Oner Ozer and Chris Tietjen....maybe Extrawelt too.
Well we got there, and Tietjen had finished and Oner couldn't get into the country because of Visa issues. I had a little bit of fun for a while (when Extrawelt were playing), but those big super club situations aren't really my cup of tea these days, and the fact that Matter was so busy didn't help. Also. Its FUCKING MILES AWAY FROM ANYTHING. Too far. Far in a kind of I wanna go home but can't be fucked because its so far. Anyway I saw lots of Vath (again fuck it) and he was doing his usual play a track all the way to the end, no matter what it is (like think of the most boring M_nus track you can and imagine doing a one bar mix at the end of 13 mins of it) and then no real mixing at all. Now if there was an awesome amount of flow to his track selection that'd be good. But there wasn't. It was rubbish.
Anyway so that was that.
On Sunday night I went to go and see Bat for Lashes in Shepherds Bush.
It was awesome. Really good sound and a nice mix of slower stuff and really up beat stuff.
I wanted to dance so much more than the night before. I liked that she had a deer head on stage with antlers that lit up for one song.
As a performer she is a funny one. She sort of has this way of appearing like she lacks confidence when she talks and that she is really bashful. It seems like a kind of an act though. A sort of look how coy and cute I am stage show.
Which is fine, because she is cute and even if its an act, its a good one, and for some reason, even though it sounds annoying, when she does it, its not.
It obviously worked to because this guy yelled out every-single-time there was a silence
"You're so hot" in a real Queer eye for the straight guy gay mans voice.
This also sounds annoying, but after he had done it five times it pushed through annoying and into funny.
After the gig, Lyndall and I were catching the tube home and what I can only assume were a group of strippers got on the tube. I assume this because they were skinny, overly made up, tanned woman with massive fake nungas. We sat down next to an Asian couple.
One of them who seemed more drunk than the rest, came over and started pole dancing on one of the tube poles and waving her ass in the Asian couples faces, and yelling
"Have you ever seen an ass like that.....no because you Asians have pan asses"
I guess she is talking about flat like a frying pan? Any help on that one would be good.
She also screamed out when the driver called out what the last stop was going to be for the train, "This train terminates at Pussy lane."
After this she continued stripping for the whole train car, got her knockers out and screamed
"If anyone of this train got me a vodka my pussy would be theirs for the night"
She then got off the train with her stripper friends and walked off down the platform, top still flapping open, boobs everywhere.
I wonder if all strippers act like this on nights out.